No, I don't have lice. I have the kids' cold. They are so kind to share their mucusy, germ infested kisses with mommy- and I'm so stupid to keep taking them. The good news is that everyone but me is feeling much better. Hooray for them and their stupid, working immune systems!

The bad news: the itching. Oh the itching! I am on the verge of madness with it! I've begged L to invent an ear snake, much like the snake thingy used by plumbers, that I could plunge into my ears and use to ease the torment in my poor little Eustachian tubes. Oh how I dream of such a device!

Also itching are the roof of my mouth and the skin around the outside of my mouth and nose. I'm a weirdo, I know, but this always happens when I have a head cold. I don't know why. I only know it is unbearable! And of course I'm already dosed up to the max on allergy medicine, so Mr. Pharmacist doesn't recommend any additional medications. Have I mentioned lately how mean I think he is? Here he is missing out on the perfect opportunity to kill me off via a benadryl overdose or tragic ear snake accident, and he won't even take the bait. Pig.

And Puff's Plus- too lotiony! Is there no happy medium between scratchy kleenex (or bless you's, as they are known in our house), and leaving a lotiony film on everything they come in contact with Puff's? For the love!