There has been a small U haul in our neighbor's driveway for a few days. Because they have a huge house and it couldn't possibly fit in that van (the furnishings, not the house), we thought perhaps they were going to a trade show or something (the wife is a SAHM who makes lacy socks for kids or something like that). But this morning, a larger van is parked out front.

I haven't even had a chance to complain to you about their stupid dogs, whose electronic fence collars somehow get turned off at least twice a day (the mom told me the kids take the batteries out all the time, which conveniently coincides with when they have to poo, so they come to my yard for that). What is up with me and neighbors who send their dogs to poop in my yard? They aren't small dogs either- a dalmatian and some other big thing, and they leave sizable deposits in our yard. Sizable, I tell you.

Of course, to be fair, they could be leaving because they fear the adolescent Hatchling will grow to be. Last fall, their 5 year old (boy) and 3 year old (girl) were over at our house and I had to take them both home wailing hysterically because Hatchling was hitting them with a plastic golf club. We're so proud of that one. The good news is that it provided a valuable lesson for H on why you don't hit- because from then on the boy would stand at the fence with his friends (in his yard) and yell about how stupid Hatchling was and how he wasn't his friend, while Hatchling stood with his little face pressed to the splinters and sobbed (in our yard), and I sat on the deck and sobbed because it is so hard to see your kids hurt. Really though, it's all good. I don't particularly agree with the neighbors' parenting style (letting toddlers roam the alley and streets without any noticeable supervision), and H always wanted to play with them and I was running out of excuses.

You know, I never had a chance with these neighbors. Before we moved in, my delightful sister asked the wife when she was due (and she wasn't at all pregnant, nor had she been recently). Bah ha ha. I crack up every time I think about it...